For many people who are struggling financially, dealing with debt collectors is an extremely emotional and painful part of every day.

There are non-stop phone calls from the collectors at work during the day, and it continues each evening at home. The mail is full of brightly colored letters that threaten lawsuits, foreclosure, judgments and wage garnishment. When an attempt is made to communicate with the collector, it many times becomes an emotional battle that can leave one depressed and in tears.

Here are some tips that can help when dealing with the debt collectors.

It is extremely important to remember when dealing with a debt collector that you are the manager of your money. Most of the tougher debt collection phone calls are related to unsecured debt. The debt owner has no liens on a tangible product or property and that leaves them only with the power of persuasion to collect the debt.

How does a collector persuade someone to pay up on an old debt? Emotions. High emotions. Many collectors are downright mean. They talk about your momma and call people names.

Why would a debt collector do this? Well, if they are mean enough it means that they will likely be paid first when the person obtains some extra money. I know people who have paid credit card debts and went without groceries! “I got rid of that mean old witch,” is what they said to me.

Some collectors try to be a best friend. They are extremely understanding and comforting. They want to help you. I like this technique better than the mean approach, but the bottom line is that YOU are the manager of YOUR money — not the collector.

It is important to be honest when speaking with debt collectors. Do not stretch the truth. Do not make promises you can not keep. Be clear and direct. Even if the collector becomes angry at the truth, that is OK. It is important to always be truthful.

It is important to be organized. I have said many times that I believe that lack of organization and lack of a plan are the top two causes of financial failure. Be organized. Keep detailed notes of each phone call with a collector. Write down the collection agent’s name, their company, the debt in question, the amount owed, and what was discussed. Capture the date and time of the discussion. Purchase a three-ring, d-ring binder and three-hole punch and organize all of the debt collection notices that arrive in the mail.

When an agreement is reached with a collector, do not provide direct access to a bank account. There are numerous complaints regarding unapproved bank drafts made by debt collectors. Obtain the agreement in writing before paying anything to the collector and then send the funds via a money order, certified check or some other electronic means.

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